Why Can't Life Just be Easy...

Not sure what is going on with me these past few days, I just find myself so sad. As Grace gets closer to her first birthday I can't help but look back at the last year and think of where we were a year ago. I was going through an up and down pregnancy, getting bad news weekly it seemed. Then to find out Grace would not be born healthy...it was a nightmare. But that was only the beginning...we spent months at her bedside wondering if she would be strong enough to pull through all of the crap she had to go through. Finally at two months old, she came home, and what should have been a wonderful day was not, because I was so scared...how would we do all of this...take care of her all by ourselves. Feeding tubes, more than 8 different meds...and if that wasn't enough stress, Grace had terrible colic. She cried day and night non stop, it was not a fun beginning. But the hardest thing is not any of the medical things...it's what comes with the idea of turning one. Walking, talking, sippy cups...and Grace is far from this. Yes, I know that she may never do some of the things that other kids can do, but that just doesn't make it any easier. Things are still not easy today, but are much better, 100 times better. Grace is smiling and "talking" now more than she is crying. She is working so hard on holding her head up. You just can't help but stare at her in amazement and smile. We enjoy all that she can do and love her so much. So sorry I went on and on, but I feel better now. Sometimes I just with life could be easier...not for me, but for my sweet Grace.